were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
