I just saw a hot homeless man
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
