I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
