i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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