I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
