You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I'm both gender and math confused
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
