I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
