the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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