Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
