Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
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