you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Every concussion has its silver lining
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
