I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Randomize
