Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
