Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Randomize
