she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
