if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
