Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
