Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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