Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
