he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
there is puke in my bra ... again
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
