Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
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