NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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