Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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