Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
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