if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize