Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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