Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
