The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
