ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I am puke
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
