I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
