Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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