I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize