I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I want a musical about memes.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
