why do cheetos always look like penises
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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