the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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