id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
did you just send me my own nude
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
