She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
