so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize