Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
