My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
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