i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
