at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
