A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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