i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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