just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
