but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
