Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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