mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
