what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Maybe he injected his testicle?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
