ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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